Fat little pig-like creatures have been running around lately causing havoc, and the public wants to know why.
"There has been an upsurge of obese midgets and dwarfs skipping around on playgrounds, schoolrooms, and in parks recently, and since we've decided to investigate, the numbers have been increasing," says one CIA agent. "With the lack of cocaine interest in this country anymore, we've had to outsource our product, which may mean dangerous weight gains for a large number of our population."
One grandmother, when asked, glanced up from her "stories" and replied cantankerously, "They're just little children who have been spoiled by poisonous food and artificial soft drinks, you ignorant fuckwits."
"There has been an upsurge of obese midgets and dwarfs skipping around on playgrounds, schoolrooms, and in parks recently, and since we've decided to investigate, the numbers have been increasing," says one CIA agent. "With the lack of cocaine interest in this country anymore, we've had to outsource our product, which may mean dangerous weight gains for a large number of our population."
One grandmother, when asked, glanced up from her "stories" and replied cantankerously, "They're just little children who have been spoiled by poisonous food and artificial soft drinks, you ignorant fuckwits."
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